Over the years we have received thousands of letters and phone calls from people who have lost a believed animal companion and are plunged into even deeper sadness by insensitive remarks and actions. We decided to ask readers of our Angel Animals Story of the Week newsletter what they thought should never be said to someone who is grieving over a pet's death.
Below are the thoughtless remarks followed by our readers' comments.
"It was only a dog/cat/rabbit/horse. . .Get over it!"
Bianca Rothschild wrote about this kind of remark: "A lifetime of devotion and supreme loyalty brushed aside and rudeness of the individual personified."
Debra Walker-Nipp: "Cleo was not just a dog. She was my true soul mate and gave her life to us. True devotion can't be replaced or found that easily."
"Why don't you just get another one?"
Kathy: "No way can you ever replace a special animal. Each one is unique. I truly believe God made them that way, as he did us humans."
"They are just stupid, dumb animals anyway."
Marla Johnson heard that comment about her deceased rabbit. She wrote, "I couldn't believe how insensitive of a remark that was because in my opinion animals are very evolved spiritual beings who are here on this planet to help humans become kinder, more loving, and compassionate people."
"You really didn't need all the health costs and food expenses of those animals."
A reader named Teresa responded to this remark by saying, "If I choose to spend my ENTIRE check on my babies, it's none of your business."
"At least it wasn't a person. Or, you could have lost a family member instead of an animal."
Jeanne Walker: "My animals are family members. I don't own them. They are part of my family in the truest sense of the word - nonjudgmental, loving, and forgiving.
We have listed resources here that can help you or family and friends as you cope with the highly estimated source of grief and sadness that occurs when a pet dies. We hope these resources help and encourage you to add comments with others you would recommend.
Saying Goodbye to Your Angel Animals
www.sayinggoodbyetoyourangelanimals.com
Interfaith Association of Animal Chaplains
www.AnimalChaplains.com, E-mail: AnimalClergy@aol.com
Everlife Memorials
www.EverlifeMemorials.com
The Animal Love and Loss Network (ALLN)
www.alln.org
The Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement, Inc. (APLB0)
www.aplb.org
Delta Society, The Pet Loss and Bereavement section
http://archive.deltasociety.org/AnimalsHealthPetLossHotline.htm
International Association of Pet Cemeteries (IAPC)
www.iaopc.com
Grief Healing
www.griefhealing.com
In Memory of Pets: Beyond Life's Gateway
www.in-memory-of-pets.com
Pet Loss Grief Support
www.petloss.com
Pet Loss Support Page
www.pet-loss.net
Rainbows Bridge
www.rainbowsbridge.com
Remember Your Pets
www.rememberourpets.com
There Is Eternal Life for Animals
www.eternalanimals.com
In Memory Of Pets
www.in-memory-of-pets.com
Animals in Heaven
www.ourchurch.com/member/w/w_lasalle
www.creatures.com/LaSalle.html
Pet Loss Support: Healing the Grief of Pet Loss DVD/Video
www.griefandlosshelpsongletter.com/indexpetlossdvd.htm
Classic Memorials, Inc.
Pet Loss & Pet Memorials Resources
http://www.everlifememorials.com/v/pet-loss.htm
Dogbunny Gazette
www.chinupchinook.com
Joyful Spirit
www.joyful-spirit.com
Mississauga Pet Loss Support
www.mississaugapets.com/petloss.html
Grief Healing
www.griefhealing.com
Pet Loss and Grief Support
www.creatures.com/PetLoss.html
If pet loss is something you are going through or continue to cope with, please accept our condolences. We know how much it hurts. We know there are people who understand. Take care of yourself by reaching out to them.
Showing posts with label animals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label animals. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Why do you call animals, angels?
Radio and television hosts and newspaper reporters frequently ask this question when we do interviews for our books. Sometimes it is accompanied by a snide comment such as, “My pet isn’t an angel!” Then they go on to report all the behavior that drives them crazy. Usually they end their tirade by saying, “But he’s family, and we love him.”
Over these many years, we have come up with answers to the question about animals as angels. We explain that our definition of an angel animal springs from the Greek derivation for the word angel, or angelos. This word literally means messenger. We believe (and have thousands of stories to back us up) that animals serve as divine messengers who bring assurance to people that yes, indeed, there is love in this world.
Then we get into the thornier aspect of the question: Is every animal an angel? This question is usually asked with a certain animal in mind who has done something humans don't consider to be angelic. How could such an animal be called an angel?
Mother Teresa once compared herself to a pencil God used for writing a love letter to the universe. Love letters, unfortunately, don’t always bring happy news. Love letters might convey a desire to end the relationship. They could strike the wrong note and fill the receiver with discomfort.
Messages can be joyful, sad, protective, or hurtful. Messages might not be deciphered for many years as life goes on and time does its duty of bringing perspective. On the other hand a message of love might make the beloved’s heart sing.
Because both animals and humans are souls, or divine sparks of God, clothed in physical form, they can serve as divine messengers. As with humans, some animal messengers are better than others. Some dilute the message with their own fears or destructive tendencies. As spiritual beings, animals vary in their states of consciousness. Yet they, too, serve as instruments, pencils in the hand of a loving God. More often then not, their messages uplift rather than destroy and turn our faces to the divine sender.
Do you think animals are angels in furry or feathery bodies?
Over these many years, we have come up with answers to the question about animals as angels. We explain that our definition of an angel animal springs from the Greek derivation for the word angel, or angelos. This word literally means messenger. We believe (and have thousands of stories to back us up) that animals serve as divine messengers who bring assurance to people that yes, indeed, there is love in this world.
Then we get into the thornier aspect of the question: Is every animal an angel? This question is usually asked with a certain animal in mind who has done something humans don't consider to be angelic. How could such an animal be called an angel?
Mother Teresa once compared herself to a pencil God used for writing a love letter to the universe. Love letters, unfortunately, don’t always bring happy news. Love letters might convey a desire to end the relationship. They could strike the wrong note and fill the receiver with discomfort.
Messages can be joyful, sad, protective, or hurtful. Messages might not be deciphered for many years as life goes on and time does its duty of bringing perspective. On the other hand a message of love might make the beloved’s heart sing.
Because both animals and humans are souls, or divine sparks of God, clothed in physical form, they can serve as divine messengers. As with humans, some animal messengers are better than others. Some dilute the message with their own fears or destructive tendencies. As spiritual beings, animals vary in their states of consciousness. Yet they, too, serve as instruments, pencils in the hand of a loving God. More often then not, their messages uplift rather than destroy and turn our faces to the divine sender.
Do you think animals are angels in furry or feathery bodies?
Sunday, August 3, 2008
The Bonds of Divine Love Between People and Animals
As we write, we're being watched (coached?) by our rescued cat, friend, and co-worker Cuddles. She curls up and observes with her loving eyes gently focused upon us. Throughout licking her paws and stretching, Cuddles continues to be steadfast in her presence. We dearly love her.
Is part of her spiritual mission in this life to support ours? We believe it is.
We, as do others, have important messages to bring to a world where there is so much suffering, turmoil, and loneliness. We long for people to understand that the bonds of divine love between people and animals, and among animals for each other, transcend fear, anger, rivalry, and isolation. Repeatedly, it is the animals who teach a better way to all of us. We recently visited New Orleans to give a presentation about Angel Animals and the heroic efforts of animal rescuers on the Gulf Coast after Katrina.
We gave our talk to the veterinarian technicians for whom we have the highest regard and respect. They were attending a reception at the American Veterinary Technician Association's annual conference. Our talk was meant to be a reminder about the necessity of cherishing the spiritual connection with animals.
In our book "RESCUED: Saving Animals from Disaster," excerpted below, we tell the story of a man who witnessed the heroics of an animal during the worst conditions. This man marveled at a dog who loved his mate more than he valued his own safety and comfort. His story sets the tone for our book. With the retelling of this heart-opening experience, we pause to remember that animals often fulfill the spiritual mission of showing people how to be more compassionate human beings.
"Days after the levees in New Orleans broke, Chris Cutter, communications director for the International Fund for Animal Welfare, worked on a boat that maneuvered through toxic water. No one, human or animal, would have wanted to spend a minute more than necessary in it. Chris recalls, 'We saw a dog swimming in the muck.' Chris's boat steered toward the dog. Instead of allowing the rescuers to help him into the vehicle, the dog turned around and swam away from the boat. That is when they heard barking coming from inside a house.
"The rescuers steered to follow the dog. He led them to the back of his house where a female dog, 'his girlfriend,' as Chris calls her, was trapped inside. Only after the rescuers freed the female dog did this big, shaggy husky allow the rescuers to haul him into the boat.
"As the boat moved away one of the rescuers petted him, saying, 'You're such a good boy.' Her hand jerked suddenly off the dog's head, as if she had touched a sizzling stove. 'My hand is burning,' she told Chris.
"'The dog could have saved himself,' Chris says. 'Instead, he swam off so we would find his girlfriend. When you are dealing with things like that, it is hard not to think that there is a validity in what you are doing. That there is something bigger going on.'"
This dog made a conscious decision and was acting with purpose to save a life. Thank goodness for Chris and the animal rescuers. They listened to their intuition and inner guidance and decided to follow this brave dog back to his barely surviving mate.
Is part of her spiritual mission in this life to support ours? We believe it is.
We, as do others, have important messages to bring to a world where there is so much suffering, turmoil, and loneliness. We long for people to understand that the bonds of divine love between people and animals, and among animals for each other, transcend fear, anger, rivalry, and isolation. Repeatedly, it is the animals who teach a better way to all of us. We recently visited New Orleans to give a presentation about Angel Animals and the heroic efforts of animal rescuers on the Gulf Coast after Katrina.
We gave our talk to the veterinarian technicians for whom we have the highest regard and respect. They were attending a reception at the American Veterinary Technician Association's annual conference. Our talk was meant to be a reminder about the necessity of cherishing the spiritual connection with animals.
In our book "RESCUED: Saving Animals from Disaster," excerpted below, we tell the story of a man who witnessed the heroics of an animal during the worst conditions. This man marveled at a dog who loved his mate more than he valued his own safety and comfort. His story sets the tone for our book. With the retelling of this heart-opening experience, we pause to remember that animals often fulfill the spiritual mission of showing people how to be more compassionate human beings.
"Days after the levees in New Orleans broke, Chris Cutter, communications director for the International Fund for Animal Welfare, worked on a boat that maneuvered through toxic water. No one, human or animal, would have wanted to spend a minute more than necessary in it. Chris recalls, 'We saw a dog swimming in the muck.' Chris's boat steered toward the dog. Instead of allowing the rescuers to help him into the vehicle, the dog turned around and swam away from the boat. That is when they heard barking coming from inside a house.
"The rescuers steered to follow the dog. He led them to the back of his house where a female dog, 'his girlfriend,' as Chris calls her, was trapped inside. Only after the rescuers freed the female dog did this big, shaggy husky allow the rescuers to haul him into the boat.
"As the boat moved away one of the rescuers petted him, saying, 'You're such a good boy.' Her hand jerked suddenly off the dog's head, as if she had touched a sizzling stove. 'My hand is burning,' she told Chris.
"'The dog could have saved himself,' Chris says. 'Instead, he swam off so we would find his girlfriend. When you are dealing with things like that, it is hard not to think that there is a validity in what you are doing. That there is something bigger going on.'"
This dog made a conscious decision and was acting with purpose to save a life. Thank goodness for Chris and the animal rescuers. They listened to their intuition and inner guidance and decided to follow this brave dog back to his barely surviving mate.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
A Camel's Gift of Grace
As we have done from time to time, we would like to share a story from our Angel Animals Story of the Week. "A Camel's Gift of Grace" was fist published in the weekly newsletter on July 26, 2008. It is a lesson in acceptance from a very wise camel.
A CAMEL'S GIFT OF GRACE
By Damaris Miller
I was at the Greeley Stampede working as a wrangler one beautiful day in June 2008. This is our yearly celebration with lots of things to do for the kids. When my shift was finished, I walked through the park area. I noticed a large camel waiting to give rides. As I watched him, I started to talk to him on the inner, soul to soul.
Being an animal lover, I said, "I am so sorry you have to do these things with all the noise around."
With such grace he said to me, "Acceptance means for now, this situation, this moment, requires me to do it, and so I do it willingly."
The camel's communication reminded me of an important quote from the book A NEW EARTH. I had been reading it at that time.
A quiet went through me. I felt no one around, just the camel and me. He had no anger in him, only love for what he was doing.
What a lesson for us all. It doesn't matter whether you are human, horse, dog, or a huge camel. The lessons are the same, because we are all soul learning the same lessons on our road to God.
The camel's grace was so evident. It made me realize that our teachers are all around us. We just have to be open and listen.
Thank you for the gift from a very special camel.
BIO:
Damaris Miller's story "Dreaming My Farewell to Springer" is featured in ANGEL ANIMALS: Divine Messengers of Miracles. She has two children, three grandchildren, and one great-grandson. Her passions are horses and going to the mountains. She lives on a ranch in Colorado, where she takes care of horses. Damaris also works as a medical receptionist.
SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT:
When you observe animals doing less than pleasant work, what lessons in graceful acceptance could you learn from them?
A CAMEL'S GIFT OF GRACE
By Damaris Miller
I was at the Greeley Stampede working as a wrangler one beautiful day in June 2008. This is our yearly celebration with lots of things to do for the kids. When my shift was finished, I walked through the park area. I noticed a large camel waiting to give rides. As I watched him, I started to talk to him on the inner, soul to soul.
Being an animal lover, I said, "I am so sorry you have to do these things with all the noise around."
With such grace he said to me, "Acceptance means for now, this situation, this moment, requires me to do it, and so I do it willingly."
The camel's communication reminded me of an important quote from the book A NEW EARTH. I had been reading it at that time.
A quiet went through me. I felt no one around, just the camel and me. He had no anger in him, only love for what he was doing.
What a lesson for us all. It doesn't matter whether you are human, horse, dog, or a huge camel. The lessons are the same, because we are all soul learning the same lessons on our road to God.
The camel's grace was so evident. It made me realize that our teachers are all around us. We just have to be open and listen.
Thank you for the gift from a very special camel.
BIO:
Damaris Miller's story "Dreaming My Farewell to Springer" is featured in ANGEL ANIMALS: Divine Messengers of Miracles. She has two children, three grandchildren, and one great-grandson. Her passions are horses and going to the mountains. She lives on a ranch in Colorado, where she takes care of horses. Damaris also works as a medical receptionist.
SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT:
When you observe animals doing less than pleasant work, what lessons in graceful acceptance could you learn from them?
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